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Sunday, April 24, 2011

Very Interesting things.

So, Alice Isobella had escaped... and just in time too.

But you know she was really sad because she had completely missed the Quilt Show.

She tried not to show her sadness... in fact she was quite good at that.

She smiled a lot, but sometimes if you looked carefully enough, you could see her sad eyes and her bottom lip just had the slightest quiver.

She was very grateful that her new friend "Beulah Baster, the batting babe" had whipped her away on her Harley....a Harley Davison Motorbike to be exact. In fact you may be interested to know that lots of cool Quilters ride on Harleys...

When someone does something kind and special for you, you must always thank them... so Alice  gave Beulah the Baster a big hug and a kind smile. "Thankyou so much" she said. Beulah, gave a shrug and got back on her bike.
"You're welcome Maam" she said and started up that big old harley, Vroom, Vroom.

In fact she was showing off a little and almost skidded as she took off down the road. 


The "Basting Babes" visited with Alice Isabella and told her that the Quilt policeman was just fine now and they didn't really hurt him with their circle of rotary cutters... in fact he decided to change his career and become a "long arm of the law" quilter.

During all these events... Alice Isobella's friend, Miss P. Smedley had been traveling.

She traveled to a place called "Hot Springs" where the hot water bubbles up from very deep in the earth.

How does it get hot?

Well, there is a big cave under the earth, small people "the Jibblings" dressed in green hats, red and white striped legs and little blue shirts spend most of their time boiling kettles on big old stoves.
This is true....
Look at this photo... and you can see the water bubbling up to the top of the earth so that we can share in this wonderful thing.






Can you imagine that if you really wanted to you could go down main street when no one is looking and take a bath in the hot springs... (that would be amazing).



Miss P. Smedley, had been in a town called Alamogordo where they have a Pure White desert with big sand hills to slide down, its amazing, it looks like snow but its hot!!!!


very, very interesting


The donkeys live on the roof






Very, very interesting.


There are cactus that look like bats with prickles and mountains so high they touch the sky.



Miss P Smedley found this a very very  interesting place.





Thursday, April 21, 2011

Alice Isabella and the Harley.



While the Quilt Policeman was tied up in the big roll of batting  the leaders of the group, grabbed the keys to the jail door off the hook on the wall and unlocked the big padlock.

Alice Isabella squealed in delight.... 

The door “sqeeched” open...... “eeeerk”

She was so excited she almost fell out the door...

Those Batting babes had it all worked out.... how clever were they.

They bustled her out the door of the Quilt Station.

“Vroom, Vroom” there was a loud roar and Alice looked up to see a huge  motor bike coming around the corner... it screeched to a halt and Batting Babe “Beulah the baster” swung her rather large leather clad leg over the tank of the bike....

It was a bit hard to tell just who she was really, she was clad in quilted leather, big black glasses, orange leather gloves and boots and on her helmet she had her name “Beulah the baster” painted with wings on the side.

Scary Mary.

Now Alice had never been on a motor bike... “they are just too dangerous”... she always said......but she really had no choice.....
“Get on Lovely” said Beulah, and Alice found herself lifted by a dozen hands onto the back of the bike....a helmet was placed on her head and tied under her chin.

“Oh my” she said.... I can’t sit like this, my knickers will show.... 

Beulah, who was used to delicate quilt ladies, produced a giant safety pin from her pocket and they pinned the dress tight over Alice’s legs so it wouldn’t blow up in the air.

Alice Isobella grabbed her straw hat (silly girl it can’t fly off it’s under the helmet) with one hand, had her bags crooked in her elbow and held on to her new friend with her other hand.





All of sudden they were off, “Vroom”, past the post office, past the grocery store, through the school yard, down the little grey lane where Mrs Needlesome lives and out into the country side....

Alice began to relax, she opened her eyes and was enjoying the wind in her curls.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Alice Isobella escapes.

There was a great deal of consternation amongst the "Batting Babes" .... Just how were they going to spring Miss Alice Isabella out of jail....?


The formed a circle, their arms 'entwined'. (That means they were sort of hugging each other).


Their heads bobbed....
There were lots of sighs....Siiiighhhhhhh and then again there were a few "Goodness Graciousnesses" and a couple of 
"Oh heaven to Betsy's".....


Suddenly their heads nodded and they raised their little arms in the air....
In musical union they yelled....


"Batting babes forever"


They had their plan.
They were prepared.
They were ready for anything.


Three of the ladies joined together and carried a roll of soft warm and 'flatural' batting under their arms... 
The other ladies followed quickly and silently, forming a single line, trying to avoid suspicion.


The lady in front put on a bright smirky smile and walked up to the Quilt Policeman who was sitting on his chair behind the desk examining a quilt for uneven stitches.


"Sir", she said, "Can you help me, I have this roll of batting and I have a problem with the brown paper that goes around it. It's stuck and I can't get it undone. Can you use your Quilt Police Quick Unpick to open it for me"


The policeman glanced up over his glasses and put down the quilt.






Suddenly the ladies pounced and rolled him right up in the batting.




He was tucked up as snug as a bug in a rug as they spun him round and round at a fast pace.
His feet almost gave way.


The Batting Babes squealed with delight and the excitement of the moment.
They made a big circle around him with their arms outstretched. In their hands they held their rotary cutters with its sharp blade just ready to pop out at the flick of a plastic click...


Now this is a very dangerous thing to do.
Children don't have a Rotary, Gotary, Lotary license.... so remember ....No touching the rotary cutter until you are at least 40 years old and you can earn your license....






Saturday, April 16, 2011

The Quilt Police





So there she was.


Behind bars.


IN JAIL !!!!!


Now I'm not too sure if you know, but there are "Quilt Police" in the Quilting business.


They have been around for a long time.... mostly they are very, very annoying.


Mostly they very strict.


Mostly they are crabby.


Mostly they just are - Ghostly Mostly.


But, I'm happy to say, that on this very occasion they were.......


Mostly helpers.


When they found out about Alice Isabella, they realised that she didn't really do anything really bad.. 


I mean, what do you think?


So the chief of the Quilt Police, 'Generous Germaine' (I think her other name is Greer) put in a call to the "batting babes" another group of famous quilters... and they dropped everything they were doing and raced to the home of Generous Germaine to an urgent  meeting.

Their faces were flushed, their bosoms heaved in exertion and they were all a little flustered... they're not used to moving so quickly, but this was an urgent case.

They  sat at a big round table. The room was dark except for a low light in the centre of the room... the ladies huddled, jiggled and talked in quiet tones as they hatched their escape plan.


Tuesday, April 12, 2011

The 'long arm' of the law

The Policeman looked down at his feet.


No doubt about it..... this was the pin culprit.


Alice shook in her black boots, her hair 'winkling' even more than before.


"Madam, do you know what damage you have done" he said in a 'gruffly' voice.?


Alice was too scared to answer. She just shook.


I mean this was the little lady who was too scared to come out from behind the pot plant... now she was being arrested.


The Policeman looked down at her from a policeman height.


He said "Eight pigeons have reported pins in the their toes. 






Six ladies have punctures in the tyres of their motor carts and 20 ladies have pins in their 'quilting crocs, we're arresting you for 'pinfull damage'"


Oh, my goodness... what will happen to Alice, will she go to jail?


Do they have a jail for quilters.?







Sunday, April 10, 2011

The Quilt Show.

Alice Isabella decided to walk to the quilt show.


She tucked her big bag full of quilting 'stuff' under her arm and began the walk down the street.


There were a lot of people  walking in this direction and that.
Their feet made loud noises on the pavement.


She passed a big line of bright yellow taxis. The drivers sat on a seat on the corner and chatted about the day while they waited for their passengers. They smiled at her as she walked passed them.
Pigeons sat by their feet and talked pigeon talk.


Suddenly she stopped, her winkly eyes winkled "What if I can't find my way back" she said out loud.
She twirled around, her "spotty lotty" dress took a little while to catch up with her spin !!!!! she almost toppled over...


Suddenly she smiled. It was happy, curly smile, and she reached into her big quilt bag and took out a little box of pins.






As she walked along she dropped the pins and she knew she had worked out her problem.


Then she was there... finally.


Her heart beat a little faster...


There was a hummmmmmmmmm in the foyer.
There was a hummmmmmmmmm in line.
There was a hummmmmmmmmm just all over the place.


It was an happy hummmmmmmmm  and then finally she was inside.


Still dropping her pins.


Alice Isabella was having a wonderful time when suddenly a policeman with a big hat and a shiny badge came up to her and put his hand on her shoulder,
"Ma'am"


Alice Whizzed around in fright.... she was so scared she dropped the pins in her hand right in front of him.....!!!!!


What will happen....!!

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Scary Mary.

Alice Isabella slept well on her big feather bed with lots of pillows.


She got up early and put on her black stockings, her 'spotty lotty' dress and combed her grey hair back into a bun. 


Her hair had a mind of it's own, it was a bit springy and it was always 'ringleting' down her neck. So she plonked her favourite hat on her head and tucked up the ringlets under the brim.


They usually stay there for a short time until she gets the colley-wobbles, then they 'sprong' out again.


She had breakfast in the big dining room of the hotel. 


It is very grand. 


There are pink pots with tall palm trees planted in them, fruit that's not real in blue bowls and big silver chandeliers hanging from a painted ceiling.


Suddenly Alice Isabella got an attack of the tummy jumbles. She realised that she was very nervous about going to the quilt show by herself.


A group of people came in and sat down talking and laughing, so Miss Alice Isabella hid behind the pot plant....








What will she do next?


How will she get to the show?


Why is she scared...who is Scary Mary?





Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Alice Isabella

Alice Isabella is a tiny lady of undermined age who lives in a note book in my hand bag.
Sometimes she sleeps a lot, but she does enjoy traveling with me.
Today she was so excited because we were going to Cincinnati (sit on the matty) to the quilt show.


She has been waiting a very long time to go and she was really, really excited. 
She has her bags full of interesting things... her clothes, magazines in case she gets bored,  and 20 cheese sandwiches wrapped in brown paper just in case she gets hungry or just in case no one feeds her or  - just in case......




She was so excited that she even wore her name tag on the plane....just in case


She was so excited that she did a little dance in the  in the line to get on the plane. Just because  - and she nearly choked herself on her name tag as it flew up in the air.




Alice Isabella loves the big comfy beds at the hotel. She asks for 8 pillows and says (with a plum in her mouth and her nose in the air) "I need to be  close to the lifts"
She doesn't really but she thinks it makes you look important to be by the lifts.


hint for grandchildren. If you want to know what it's like talking with a plum in your mouth.
Ask your Mum for one and try it....!!!